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Altruism. Seems like a difficult word to dissect especially when one that possesses it does not always show it, and even at times, obscures the notion simply by displaying the contrast. But just as you have watched the film Crash, you will see that a trait is not always a straight forward thing. You can be a non-racist policeman but get caught in a very racially sensitive situation which prods you to turn racist. You can be a sincerely pious guy but come a situation when you are enticed to engage in vice, you would probably do it - in that specific context. Humans are complex beings. It is very hard to pin down one's immutable traits from a small series of incidents. Humans display their traits according to specific contexts. But throughout time, one can probably discern a trend that shows evidence of a permanent, perpetual trait.
Don't know if I am making sense here.
This is true of a man called Mohd Som Haji Sulong. This is a man who came from a very humble beginning, born and bred in a god forsaken fishermen's village called Tanjung Kapor in Kuala Terengganu. He was born into a big family of 8 siblings with a father named Haji Sulong and mother named Che Esah. He was rather different from the rest of his siblings with an extraordinary inclination towards knowledge from a very young age. At a time when his peers use to play street soccer or brawl on the streets, or peep on young girls taking a shower (not that he has not done it), he was a very studious young boy. And even without the benefits of electricity in the village, he used to read under kerosene lamps (lampu minyak tanah) and at times, reading under the public lighting on the streets. He used to read until late at night and his mother will bring him a piece of banana for him should he go hungry during the night.
His hard labour paid off when he passed his Senior Cambridge (SPM equivalent those days) with flying colours, and was one of 2 Malay boys in his neighborhood to obtain grade 1 in both the SC (Senior Cambridge) and FMC in 1961. His success was even published in the local newspaper. After his SC in July 1962, he worked at the Eastern Mining & Metals Co. Ltd. (EMMCO) in Bukit Besi Terengganu for 4 years before eventually obtaining a Mara scholarship to study in the UK on October 1966. Thus he spent an important part of his life in London, studying law at Lincoln’s Inn. He always talks about London and how he cherished his time there. His conversations always imply a special affinity toward the old metropolitan town.
Upon returning home, he landed a good job. He helped his brothers fund their education either in local universities and even to study overseas. He was always trying to help his siblings get better education. This continued with his children. Blessed with three boys, Mohd Som sent them to private schools, believing in giving them the best in education. After SPM, he sent the children to study A-levels in the UK, and subsequently undergraduate studies as well.
Recently, I noticed something powerful about him. His younger brother passed away recently, and the whole family rushed back to Terengganu to visit the grave and pay condolences. At the widow’s home, we talked a lot about Abdul Rahman, his younger brother (better known as Pok Hitam). Mohd Som spoke incessantly of him, of how he was the best singer among the siblings, even better than Ismail (ayahsu) the youngest of the siblings; of how he has always been a very shy person - he recalled one occasion when his brother returned home from the market with fish wrapped in newspaper, carrying it in a way so as to avoid people thinking that he was carrying fish. He spoke of his brother’s fondness in drawing, particularly of animals, and that he disliked studying.
In the course of the conversation, I realised an extraordinary affection he has for his brother. Just like how a mother would proudly talk about her child, Mohd Som was rambling away about his achievements and his salient traits, and with noticeable but reluctant tears streaming from his eyes. I soon realised how much he loved his brother, and come to think of it, his parents, (especially his mother whom he has high respect for) his other siblings, and his family. This was evident in his continuous support for them, and even for the sibling’s children. It just dawned upon me that it was his love for his family and those close to him that made possible a lot of things for us. Had it not been for his unconditional support, my uncle would not be speaking Italian. My brother would not be enjoying RyanAir flights. I would not be as open minded had I not been exposed to the different cultures in the UK. Hell, I probably would not even work in the place I am working in now. The list goes on.
Yet, it is difficult to appreciate his sacrifices when one is confronted with his character. Mohd Som has a very strong character. He is very persistent in doing what he wants. He has a clear-cut attitude, he will tell you what he thinks about you even if it means offending you. If you can overcome this attitude, you will have a pleasant time with him.
Nonetheless, this is a man who showed an extraordinary degree of love, not through words (which he is very lousy at – most men are), but through his actions. The fruit of his labour is in the people. As the saying goes, judge the tree by its fruits. The tree might be horrible and cold – falling branches and all that. But what matters is the fruit that it produces. And indeed, his fruits are the many people that he has helped throughout his lifetime.
This man is Mohd Som, my father. And for that, I would like to say thank you for everything he has done for me.
Your son,
Fazil Irwan Mohd Som
Don't know if I am making sense here.
This is true of a man called Mohd Som Haji Sulong. This is a man who came from a very humble beginning, born and bred in a god forsaken fishermen's village called Tanjung Kapor in Kuala Terengganu. He was born into a big family of 8 siblings with a father named Haji Sulong and mother named Che Esah. He was rather different from the rest of his siblings with an extraordinary inclination towards knowledge from a very young age. At a time when his peers use to play street soccer or brawl on the streets, or peep on young girls taking a shower (not that he has not done it), he was a very studious young boy. And even without the benefits of electricity in the village, he used to read under kerosene lamps (lampu minyak tanah) and at times, reading under the public lighting on the streets. He used to read until late at night and his mother will bring him a piece of banana for him should he go hungry during the night.
His hard labour paid off when he passed his Senior Cambridge (SPM equivalent those days) with flying colours, and was one of 2 Malay boys in his neighborhood to obtain grade 1 in both the SC (Senior Cambridge) and FMC in 1961. His success was even published in the local newspaper. After his SC in July 1962, he worked at the Eastern Mining & Metals Co. Ltd. (EMMCO) in Bukit Besi Terengganu for 4 years before eventually obtaining a Mara scholarship to study in the UK on October 1966. Thus he spent an important part of his life in London, studying law at Lincoln’s Inn. He always talks about London and how he cherished his time there. His conversations always imply a special affinity toward the old metropolitan town.
Upon returning home, he landed a good job. He helped his brothers fund their education either in local universities and even to study overseas. He was always trying to help his siblings get better education. This continued with his children. Blessed with three boys, Mohd Som sent them to private schools, believing in giving them the best in education. After SPM, he sent the children to study A-levels in the UK, and subsequently undergraduate studies as well.
Recently, I noticed something powerful about him. His younger brother passed away recently, and the whole family rushed back to Terengganu to visit the grave and pay condolences. At the widow’s home, we talked a lot about Abdul Rahman, his younger brother (better known as Pok Hitam). Mohd Som spoke incessantly of him, of how he was the best singer among the siblings, even better than Ismail (ayahsu) the youngest of the siblings; of how he has always been a very shy person - he recalled one occasion when his brother returned home from the market with fish wrapped in newspaper, carrying it in a way so as to avoid people thinking that he was carrying fish. He spoke of his brother’s fondness in drawing, particularly of animals, and that he disliked studying.
In the course of the conversation, I realised an extraordinary affection he has for his brother. Just like how a mother would proudly talk about her child, Mohd Som was rambling away about his achievements and his salient traits, and with noticeable but reluctant tears streaming from his eyes. I soon realised how much he loved his brother, and come to think of it, his parents, (especially his mother whom he has high respect for) his other siblings, and his family. This was evident in his continuous support for them, and even for the sibling’s children. It just dawned upon me that it was his love for his family and those close to him that made possible a lot of things for us. Had it not been for his unconditional support, my uncle would not be speaking Italian. My brother would not be enjoying RyanAir flights. I would not be as open minded had I not been exposed to the different cultures in the UK. Hell, I probably would not even work in the place I am working in now. The list goes on.
Yet, it is difficult to appreciate his sacrifices when one is confronted with his character. Mohd Som has a very strong character. He is very persistent in doing what he wants. He has a clear-cut attitude, he will tell you what he thinks about you even if it means offending you. If you can overcome this attitude, you will have a pleasant time with him.
Nonetheless, this is a man who showed an extraordinary degree of love, not through words (which he is very lousy at – most men are), but through his actions. The fruit of his labour is in the people. As the saying goes, judge the tree by its fruits. The tree might be horrible and cold – falling branches and all that. But what matters is the fruit that it produces. And indeed, his fruits are the many people that he has helped throughout his lifetime.
This man is Mohd Som, my father. And for that, I would like to say thank you for everything he has done for me.
Your son,
Fazil Irwan Mohd Som
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